1981-1982 Class Picture

The first boy I crushed over emailed me this. We were never a couple, possibly because I was ALWAYS the Jolly Green Giant and well, he was not. Not to mention, we were like 6 when my love for him began.

Thanks for the trip down memory lane. Good times, good times.

Twas The Night Before Christmas

and all through the house - EVERYONE was stirring - even the mouse.

Wishing you all a night full of excitement and a morning full of love.

Merry Christmas!!!

3 Days Until Christmas...

and I am high on my Soco and eggnog. I CAN NOT drink the water. We all know what happens when you drink the water.

I am now like the last girl standing.

A Southern Thank You

As a thank you from a family friend well rooted in her southern heritage, I received a years subscription to Southern Living.

I think the magazine is great. I just hope the next time she visits, she doesn't 'quiz' me on the recipes the mag is overflowing with.

No matter how long I live in the south, I will never be a southern lady of the kitchen. I am the yankee chick - in front of the tv - watching football - drinking a beer with the boys.

Adding Insult To Injury

They are showing clips of Cyrano De Begerac on the Today Show this morning.

Hmmm...I wonder if I could get one more trip as a Xmas gift...

It Does Not Feel Like Christmas...

when it is 70 degrees at 8 pm on December 8th. I need snow. Lots of white snow. I want.need.expect.deserve.WANT a white christmas.

Anyone know how much a snow machine costs???

Things That Make You Go Hmmm...

My all time favorite song lyric/title - Things That Make You Go Hmmm. It is just so true. There are some things I often just say "Hmmm..." to.

Thank God I have the ability to say "F&^% it" too.

I know, I know...another cryptic post.

Things that make you go hmmm... ;)

She Has Been Holding Out

My lil B has been living a double life. Little did I know she has been acting. Not surprising, she doesn't have to 'act' much. She is a natural for the part.

Thanks to MommaPeas for this CLASSIC find!!! XOXO">

She DID Have a Mullet

And none of my friends told me. My mother - of course - was honest. She advised me to cut the back of lil B's hair. "It looks stringy and silly. A nice cut will help." Ever since, I have had this itching knowledge that my baby was sporting a mullet.

I broke down and had her first hair cut. Her hair looks a 100x better. Plus, I got to witness the inner Diva in my baby. She LOVED being pampered. Daddy better find a second job. He already compared her $20.00 cut to his $9.00 cut.

Then again...have you seen his hair. ;)

Christmas Edition - Getting To Know Your FRiends.

Okay, here's what you're supposed to do, copy, paste, and insert your answers. Don't be a SCROOGE!!!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? wrapping paper - but if I am feeling lazy...bags.

2. Real tree or artificial? real - they smell holiday-icious!

3. When do you put up the tree? When hubby gets around to buying it.

4. When do you take the tree down? January. If you count the months last year's tree sat in our yard - 10 (October.

5. Do you like eggnog? I like some eggnog with my Southern Comfort

6. Favorite gift received as a child? My bikes

7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes

8. Hardest person to buy for? Paw Paw

9. Easiest person to buy for? Myself.

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? A stuffed Tweety Bird. I was 12 and way past stuffed animals.

11. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail only! I love holiday cards.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Home Alone.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? Several years it has been on Christmas Eve.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? ummm...I plead the fifth.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Home cooked Christmas meals. Did I already mention the eggnog with SoCo??

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Colored

17. Favorite Christmas song? Mariah Carey - All I Want For Xmas is you.

18. Travel for Christmas or stay at home? shoot...When am I not traveling...

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeers? I think I can.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? An angel dressed in Santa's robes.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Morning Only.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? buying for people just
because its the chrstmas season. Its so much better to buy something for
someone because you want to.

23. What I love most about Christmas? The decorations....and the presents. Oh...and the eggnog with SoCo. (At least I am honest.)

Is He Worth a Copy?

I borrowed a DVD Recorder from a friend. (Big shout outs to you MommaDrool!) I have several old VHS tapes that I want copied to dvds. While scouring through my stuff, I found a couple tapes that contain my previous life. I am now left pondering...

Is the X and that whole 'other' life worth burning onto a dvd???

For those of you who know me well, my answer is - as always when it comes to the X - a resounding 'HELL NO!' But I wonder, will I possibly want to view them in the future???

Mama! Don't Leave Me .

My first Pilates class was this morning. lil B was in the nursery. She seemed content. I was in the group room, literally about to make my FIRST ever pilates move, when suddenly from behind me I hear "Mama! DOn't leave me." Sure as shiat, my child had made her way into the exercise room. The music was pumping. She started dancing. Her eyes lit up like it was her birthday party. There was NO returning lil B to the nursery, no matter what I bribed her with. As she threw a wonderfully embarrassing 2 year old's tantrum, I collected my belongings and whisked her out the door.

In the car, lil B proceeded to tell me she wanted to play at home. "No more exercise." And then sang "Lollipop, lollipop..."

How Could Someone Not?

To validate my point when I am 100% sure of something, I always say "Trust me." It irritates the shiat out of hubby. (Maybe because I am always right. ha!)

This morning, lil B was informing me of something. She finished it with...

"Trust me mama."

I Partied Like a NYC Rock Star.

I had a Fun-tastic trip to NYC sans husband and child. It involved 5 days of drinking and other various activities, but mostly drinking. I have listed the highlights of my trip for your reading enjoyment...

Thursday night: Flew into LaGuardia. Drank wine. Ate damn good sushi.

Friday: Visited my cousin's 3rd grade class and read a book about Rosa Parks. Can you guess why? (85% of the class are immigrants. 2 of which just came from Dubai. One little girl is from Mexico and does not speak a word of english. HOWEVER, I was fascinating because I live in ALABAMA!) Ate sushi again. Went to a club on Long Island . Drank Beer. Danced with Goombahs who still still wear black t-shirts, black leather coats, and a GIANT gold cross. Did I mention they were all 4 feet tall?.

Saturday: Drove around the 'hood looking for familiar faces and only saw my friend's dad. Ate in a cave. Drank more wine. Called a friend for pot. (OMA - disregard that statement. It is joke. I don't smoke.) Went to the Marines' Ball. Drank wine. Text messaged hubby a dirty picture. Ruined his night because he thought I was at a male strip club on talent night. Left my camera at Novo.



Sunday: Did the walk of shame to retrieve my camera. Edwin knew it was mine because "the pictures were all of Caucasian girls." Ate damn good Spanish food. Drank Sangria. Returned to my new home away from home - Novo - to drink more wine.

Monday: Walked the city and took pictures of the Broadway show I never got to see. (Sulked over how close I was to becoming Jennifer Garner's new best friend.) Ate a delicious pastrami sandwich at the famous Stage Deli. Had enough pastrami left over to feed a third world country for a week. Bought some useless souvenir shiat for the 3,000th time. Returned to Novo for dinner. Got to see an old friend who doesn't smoke pot. Drank myself silly. (My cousin claims to have me on video.)

Tuesday: Woke up with my right arm beyond numb. Took cab BACK to LaGuardia. With an hour before my flight's departure, was told I had to fly out of Kennedy. Had Osama Bin Landen himself, rush me in a cab to JFK. Breezed through security with 10 minutes to spare. My flight was then 1 & 1/2 hours late taking off.

Now I am detoxing, and sadly craving more wine....


'Til we possibly meet again JG.

Celebrity In The Making...

I changed her diapers, and now I can legally have a glass of wine with her. And once when she was 10, she tried to drown me in the pool.

Love ya babe! Keep doing yo' thang!

Halloween Memories...

Mama's big girl.



Thank God it's over! My aching feet.

Lathered Up In Vaseline

lil B had her 2 year pictures taken today. Of course, in preparation for the big phot shoot, she had a long bubbly bath the night before. So this morning as I am getting dressed, lil B decides to 'get ready' herself.

I find her in the guest bathroom. Hair LATHERED in Vaseline. (This also includes the bathroom sink, floor, and cabinet knobs.)

I should have taken a picture. Instead, I panic and throw her in the tub.

She posed and smiled angelically for her pictures. However Mama knows there is a little devil inside her too.

Like mother, like daughter.

Treating Myself

While in NYC, one of my best friends and I will be attending this play on Broadway. It will also be my first solo trip in 3+ years. (By solo I mean no hubby or lil B.) I am SUPER excited!!!

Mommy deserves some fun time too!

The Perfect Halloween Costume

I think it is hilarious that I actually sing this song to my hubby while I clean. The costume could not be more perfect for me. ;)




Cinderelly, Cinderelly
Night and day it's Cinderelly
Make the fire, fix the breakfast
Wash the dishes, do the mopping
And the sweeping and the dusting
They always keep her hopping
She goes around in circles
Till she's very, very dizzy
Still they holler
Keep a-busy Cinderelly

Sucker for the Bullseye

God is great,
Target is too damn good.
Now I just need more money,
since the store is in my 'hood.

lil B and I spent almost 2 hours roaming the aisles of Target this afternoon. I salivated at every aisle. However, I decided to make it an educational experience and not just one of mindless spending. Since we were in no rush for time, I let lil B walk the aisles with me. If she picked up an item, I allowed her to examine it. Then I taught her the importance of putting the item back where she found it. (I figure she needs to get use to this concept.)

All went extremely well until I started running into people I know. Don't get me wrong, I actually love seeing familiar faces. Having only resided in this great state for three years, it makes me feel at home. What sucks is I realize now I will have to be more conscious of what I wear in public. On days when I run quick errands, I look like...well to be honest...shit.

My damage today was $70.00. Not too bad. Not too good, considering I didn't need anything. God was on hubby's side tho. No one asked me about signing up for a Target card, nor the extra 10% I would get off my purchase.

If only this great state would institute a lottery...and make me a winner.

No Love Lost - Tennessee.

Beer at 9 am - Ugh.
Sunburn from 4 hours in the heat - Ouch.
Being there to watch Tennessee get their A-S-S whooped - PRICELESS.

Two years ago, Fat Phil thought he would need a police escort in Alabama.
Yesterday, he wondered if he would need an escort in Tennessee.

Post Retraction: For Sale

We are not going anywhere. Mostly, because we can not decide on an area. We do like several locations, but truly we love where we are. With the new Target's arrival, the traffic-less commutes, and growing housing market (interpreted as big new affordable homes) it is hard to look elsewhere. I also found a gorgeous subdivision in our current area that I would love to live in. Time and money will tell all.

So for now, no moving trucks or boxes. However, you never know what tomorrow brings with this family...since real estate is our specialty.

Welcome Princess B

Let the dress up fun begin!
Just so long as she doesn't want to go out with all this crap on.

"Pleeease."

lil B has learned how and when to use the word please. I love that she is learning to be polite, however she has also learned that the word will get her almost ANYTHING she wants. Maybe it is because the word usage is still new, but when she throws in the please - I am like putty in her hands.

"Mama - want it! *** Please."

I am still a new mom, because I am still a sucker for cute.

February 1990.

Me in the Hard Rock.

Table For Two Please.

lil B and I decided to have yummy Mexican for lunch today. The hostess seats us, and lil B decides to sit in the seat across the table from me. I think for a second. "Good idea? Not a good idea?" I let it go and allow her to sit there.

As we sit sharing the chips and salsa, excitedly recapping the events that took place at Kids Gym that morning, I felt out of place. It was like being in an alternate universe. My lil B seemed all grown up. Talking, eating, drinking the restaurant cup w/straw requiring no assistance from me. It scared the shiat out of me. WTF has happened to my BABY?!

The lunch continued this way. Pleasant, enjoyable. Not the typical lunch one expects with a toddler. However, I did catch myself saying, "Don't stuff your mouth. Sit still. Use your napkin." WTF has happened to me?!

My child is becoming me, and I have become my mother. God has a sick sense of humor.

On The Road Again.

We are moving. Again. Since I left NY, I have almost lost count of the number of times I have moved from state to state, city to city. I truly have not been able to call any place home in 17 years.

Despite my habitual relocating, I actually despise the whole process. Packing, unpacking, redecorating, yadda, yadda, and yadda. If I could afford to move into a new place and dress it up right away, maybe then it wouldn't be as bad. However, I can't. To add salt to my wounds, I am impatient too. When I want something done, I want it done yesterday. Moving into a new home always requires new window treatments, bedspreads for newly added beds, furniture, and again...yadda, yadda, and yadda.

So, here is to what may be the last few months. I love my current house. But yet again, it has proven not to be permanent.

Ball Biter

While waiting to board our flight home from the big apple a couple weeks ago, my lil B was playing with her new Minnie Mouse ball. It was the perfect toy to keep her entertained. That was until she decided to take a bite out of it.

"Sweetheart! We don't bite balls!"

The old man sitting in his wheelchair who had been pleasantly amused by her play, slaps his knee and chuckles hard.

Mortified, I realize how dirty my statement sounded.

Leave it to the dirty old man. Polluting my innocent mind. No matter how true this statement might be.

11 Secrets Women Keep

1. Everything a woman buys for herself -- from shoes to skirts and even shampoo -- really costs 20 percent more than she tells you.

2. She actually thinks about sex -- with you -- a lot. (It's just that by the end of the day she's too tired to do anything about it.)

3. She is just as nervous about commitment as you are.

4. She may be modern and independent, but she still wants you to be "the man."

5. Her ex-boyfriends were not completely terrible in bed.

6. She is scared that she'll turn into her mother. (So the worst insult you can throw at the woman you love is, "You're acting just like your mother.")

7. She wants you to be jealous -- but just a little bit.

8. Yes, she fantasizes about hot celebrity guys, but that doesn't mean she wants you to be one of them.

9. She tells her girlfriends more than she will ever admit to you (but less than you fear).

10. She really does notice and appreciate all the chores you do.

11. She loves you with all her heart, but she still gets wistful about the fact that she'll never feel that falling-in-love sizzle and spark again.

Knock knock...

Me: "Who is it?" Her: "Your past."

Having spent last week in my old 'hood, I saw some old and very familiar faces. It is amazing how life takes us in different directions. Places I could NEVER have imagined any of us going. Then to top it all off, I stumble across my first love.

It sounds silly to think I felt butterflies in my tummy when I saw his picture. It was so long ago that I 'knew' him. But, there is something about that first love that you hold with you forever. Innocent love, fresh and young. Of course, my love for my husband is far more vibrant and fulfilling than any love I have encountered or could want, but memories of the first time are - sweet and comforting. A time long gone, but not forgotten.

It has been 18 years since I first fell in 'love'. Although if you count my childhood crush on Keith...

"Mama...Mama...???" Got to run...the present is calling.

Crickets

..were actually an annoying sound for me when I moved from NYC to the south. Well, as of this weekend, the sound on TRAFFIC is the most annoying sound in the world. I love NYC but messing with my sleep makes me reconsider the love.

More later. I am too exhausted to post.

I have a loose

tongue. Crap. Sometimes, I say things without thinking. An old friend - actually I have known her so long she is almost like a sister to me - is coming to visit from NY in October. It so happens, a few days before she and her one year old arrive, my folks will be in town for lil B's birthday. So like a dumb a-s-s, I mention to my mother about staying until my friend flies in. This way my mother can meet her daughter. My mother ALL EXCITEDLY agreed. As I hung up the phone, I realized I would have a swinging front door for a week. CRAP!

I try to remind myself, that this is what life is about. Enjoying seeing family and friends, and to hell with the mess in the house. ;O)

Creepy

Check out RalphLauren.com Their jean models...actually model the jeans.

The Taliban

Just for you Momma Drool. It might not be a good idea to leave our girls alone together. ;O)

Cute

While shopping for green clothes (school colors for hubby's football team) in Goodys yesterday, my lil B said "Cute Mama", as I eyed a shirt. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. She has my taste obviously, since I too, thought the shirt was cute. However, at the very tender age of 22 months, she knows what cute clothes are...

Ay ya i

Nostalgia

Having received the email "I am a New Yorker" which I generously posted for all to read, I decided to flip through my old photos and post some.

We hung out in Cental Park


We graffiti-ed building walls


We went to parades (photo:St Patrick's Day 1985)


We walked to school in groups


We played softball on concrete


To the crew: Good times, good times!

(Yes, that is my proud father with his can of beer.)


Love and miss you guys!!! XOXO

I am a New Yorker

I am a New Yorker
I do not live in the five boroughs or on the Island or Upstate
I may live hundreds or thousands of miles away
Or I may live just over the GW Bridge
But I am a New Yorker

I am a New Yorker
Whatever took me out of New York:
Business, family or hating the cold
did not take New York out of me.
My accent may have faded and my pace may have slowed
But I am a New Yorker

I am a New Yorker
I was raised on Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and Rockefeller Plaza,
The Yankees or the Mets (Giants or Dodgers)
Jones Beach, Rye Beach, Rockaway Beach or one of the beaches
on the sound
I know that "THE END" means Montauk.
Because I am a New Yorker

I am a New Yorker
When I return to visit, I never look up
Skyscrapers are something I take for granted
The Empire State Building and the Statue of Liberty are part of me
Taxis and noise and subways and "get outa heah" don't rattle me
Because I am a New Yorker

I am a New Yorker
I was raised on cultural diversity before it was politically correct
I eat Greek food and Italian food, Jewish and Middle Eastern food and
Chinese food
Because they are all American food to me.
I don't get mad when people speak other languages in my presence
Because my relatives got to this country via Ellis Island and chose to stay
They were New Yorkers

People who have never been to New York have misunderstood me
My friends and family work in the industries, professions and
businesses that benefit all Americans
My firefighters died trying to save New Yorkers and non-New Yorkers
They died trying to save Americans and non-Americans
Because they were New Yorkers.

I am a New Yorker
I feel the pain of my fellow New Yorkers
I mourn the loss of my beautiful city
I feel and dread that New York will never be the same
But then I remember:
I am a New Yorker

Wherever we live, whatever we do, whoever we are
There are New Yorkers in every state and every city of this nation
We will not abandon our city
We will not abandon our brothers and sisters
We will not abandon the beauty, creativity and diversity that New York represents
Because we are New Yorkers
And I am proud to be a New Yorker

You Son Of A Bi@tch

I don't care if we are in a drought and you need water. I don't care if my home is cool in temperature. I don't care that you just need a place to call 'home'. You are not welcome. From what I know about you, you can live through a nuclear fallout. So you should be able to survive mother nature's elements.

Stay out of my house you nasty bastard. Mr. Terminix will be here shortly, removing any welcome mats you think might exist.

P.S. My lil B is well on her way to not liking you either. She knows to do the coocaracha dance and scream for daddy. I have taught her well.

I Love You

"Lov you too" and she sleeps peacefully - with no tears - in her big girl bed.

Oh Shit

This is what my child now says when I slam on the brakes in the car. Hubby has always joked that as long as curse words are used in the right context and said at the right time, it would be acceptable. I am not so sure about this now. Although my brother who experienced it first hand tonight thinks it is classic, I am a little concerned.

Oh shit...where was I going with this post...

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

While shopping for Buddha's birthday gift at Toys' R Us today, I realized I love buying little boy stuff. (Hell, I LOVE buying toys.) I couldn't decide which vehicle I liked more, which he would cherish more, or which was more durable for a 2 year old. I also came to the realization that shopping for a boy is just as difficult as shopping for a girl. I initially thought I could pick up a truck and go. Ha! Naive I was. After narrowing my decision down to still several, I decided to go with them all. I will let Random Mommy worry about where she will put these ENORMOUS things. ;)

Christmas this year is going to be so much fun!

Bourne Believer

Move over 007, this is a Jason Bourne generation. I am now a loyal Bourne lover and follower.

If only I could add a music clip to this post. It would be 'that' song.

Go see the movie.

700+

That is how many channels we have. It is also the number of channels with nothing on worth watching.

RSVP: HELL NO

The audacity. You have never invited me to your home. Never asked if our kids could get together and play. Not once called and invited me to lunch. Yet month after month, I get an invitation to one of your 'social parties' that requires me to buy something. At these parties, I know you earn points that in turn leads to free gifts for you. Has my lack of attendance not been obvious enough? And I will not even begin to mention all of the perks you have already received because you are associated with this family. You will not exploit me. So the answer to your invitation - yet again - is:

HELL TO THE F'ing NO!

Delay of Game

For the past 3 years, hubby and I have had season tickets to EVERY Bama home game. The one game I missed...the BIG Florida/Bama game in 2005. Yes - THAT game. It was a few days before my due date. My doctor advised me not to go, or I might give birth in the stands. ARGH. (Doctors, what do they know. I ended up being a week late.) Missed a damn good game for nothing. I digress. My point is...we finally have a kick A-S-S coach and no season tickets. Turns out a lot of 'fair weather fans' are coming out of the wood work causing the demand for tickets to soar.

This season - probably one of the best seasons the Tide has seen in a while - hubby and I will be watching from our boring couch. Ba humbug.

Anyone having any good football parties???

School Daze

Although it is still a ways off, hubby and I have been discussing schools for our pumpkin. Having made a few calls, we were faced with the realization that there really is a waiting list for the good schools. Crap. My child is about to be 2. She is not even potty trained yet. It just seems surreal that we need to start focusing on this now. What is worse, hubby and I do not see eye to eye. Of course, her education is of paramount significance, but I would like it to be a faith based education. How do you make a decision like this that will forever effect your baby?! My child is going to be molded and sculpted by people I choose. Ugh - the pressure!

Let the praying for heavenly guidance begin. (I hope He doesn't remember I have not been to mass in a while.)

Sneak Peek Into The Future

For a month I have had company. Not just one person, but several throughout my birthday month. My final guest left this evening.

I feel an emptiness inside. What was a laughter filled, conversation engulfed house, is now quiet. It doesn't help that hubby is out of town too. This just adds to the sad silence.

Although I know the future is still a long way off...I think I am experiencing empty nest syndrome. Boy - does it suck.

The Departed

Holy hell! I am in LOVE with Leonardo DiCaprio. We finally watched The Departed last night. For those who have not seen it - a damn fine movie. Since lil B was born, our movie nights - even rented ones - have become almost non-existent. Back to my point...

I LOVE Leonardo DiCaprio.

July = Birthday MONTH

For a long time I have joked that I celebrate my birthday the entire month. One year, I kind of did. (It was a great month & year!) This year, I am doing it again. With lots of family coming in town, I am SUPER excited! Granted they are not coming in specifically because it is my birthday month, more so it works better with their schedules. None the less, let the celebrating begin!!! Oh and have I mentioned yet it is the big 07-07-07. (Redundancy this month is excused per the birthday girl.)

"It's my birthday MONTH! I'm gonna to party like it's my birthday MONTH! I'm gonna sip Bacardi like it's my birthday MONTH!"

(You know you were humming the tune...)

All me.

I try to be an honest person.
I don't say things I don't mean. If I say I am sorry, I am.
I have no hidden agenda.
I am a basic - what you see is what you get.
I try my best to be a good person.
I try my best to be a good friend.
I try.

I am me.

Mingle² - Online Dating

Thankful

God brings people into our lives at different times. It is amazing how He knows who, when, and how it will all work out.

I am so grateful for all my blessings - new and old.

XOXO

I Spy

Today I passed what i think was the hatch from Lost. It was being towed on a flat bed with the usual 'over sized load' warning cars around it.

Seriously tho, other than the obvious modular home, WTF are those things in transit?! I literally did a double take today.

Besa Mi Culo

It is just a fact of life. At some point no matter who you are, you will have to kiss some one's ass. I really don't mind kissing a little ass, especially if it results in a positive outcome for me. And vice versa, I don't mind a little saliva on my bum bum either. HOWEVER, there is a big difference between kissing ass and licking the hole. I pointed this act out today. I was told to mind my own business. I just can not handle someone getting his/her hole licked especially when he/she feels entitled AND is unappreciative.

Act of Contrition

I am sorry. Sorry that it happened, sorry for how things are now, sorry I can't seem to 'shake it off' and get over it. There is a lot invested in us, and I am not willing to completely let go. Time heals all wounds, and if history repeats itself, we will be chatting it up like old times soon enough. Too many memories - good and bad - to say goodbye.

Know that I do love and miss you.

~me

Boyfriend Shmoyfriend.

I feel for Cameron Diaz. JT is all over the gossip columns with his new woman Jessica Biel...looking all happy go lucky to be in 'new' love. I like Cameron Diaz. She comes across as fun and easy going. (Of course, I am equally a Timberlake fan.) It just sucks when the other person moves on first. As kewl as I think it would be to be a household Hollywood name, this is an example of why I love being little ol'me in suburbia Ala - bama.

Coupon Cutter Me

I try to save a few bucks here and there. I don't have a paying job, so I feel it only prudent of me to spend wisely. Sometimes, buying the more expensive item is worth the extra dollar. I mean in all honesty, some stuff should just be labeled "Cheap Crap".

Slumber Party

Baby B prefers to sleep in our bed. She has since day the day she was born. Cat naps, full afternoon naps, and bedtime are all preferred in our queen size bed. Yup...that is right, we don't even have a king.

Anyway, the point of this post is to admit my guilt. Daddy is gone, and pumpkin is keeping his spot warm.

Oh well...I guess we will be back to 'Phase 1- Crying It Out In Her Own bed' come Tuesday.

Spendin' Cheese

I was meant to be rich. My taste is too expensive for my wallet. I was actually in the mood to 'window' shop for myself today. So, while perusing thru Parisain - my personal fav, I happened upon the Ralph Lauren section. I didn't even bother to look at the price tags as I drooled over the fabulous outfits.

Of course, once home, I hit the Ralph Lauren website. Yes, I want the $1,000.00 dress. Yes, I know for a fact the $199.00 capri jeans would look fabulous on me. Yes, that $1,500.00 belt would go great with a $200.00 pair of jeans.

Yes, it hurts window shopping. Anyone see this weekends Goody's ad?...

Stuttering Stttacy Stuttering Stttacy

I don't know what my deal is. Ever since I had little B, I can't seem to spit out the words in my mouth. They literally get to the tip of my tongue, and I find myself tripping over them.

Today for instance, I could not say 'Pediatric'. Simple...4 syllable word...and I...like a dumb a-s-s froze every time. It pisses me off.

When I was younger, I intentionally subjected myself to public speaking situations. I would get so nervous, I actually gasped for air. But I knew, with practice and perseverance, I would improve. I took classes in high school and college that taught effective communication skills. I practiced counting my 'um's & ah's'. I became a lector at church and read from the pulpit on Sundays. I acted in plays, gave speeches in classes, and later in my career days, I held new hire orientation and training classes in which I talked for hours straight.

Is this a symptom of mommy hood no one informed me of??? This inability to effectively articulate my thoughts makes me sound like a babbling imbecile. I tell you, I can speak - quite well actually...just not lll-aatt-ely.

I think I will take up sign language or become a mime. Either way, I might have a better chance of having more intelligible conversations.

Hmmm...in retrospect...I never seem to fumble on my bad words.

I Love My Husband Today.

This evening, after my concerned discussion about our neglected yard, darling hubby is outside doing yard work. Okay, so maybe it is watering and pulling some random weeds, but it is yard work none the less. Did I mention he despises yard work? I do too, so I can't complain much.

The best part tho, pumpkin is outside with him. I am sure he won't accomplish much, but this is one of those moments when I remember why I love him so.

Do they make them in size 10???

Where were all these cute shoes when I was growing up?! In the 3rd grade I had a pair of bright blue Gonzo (yes - from the Muppets) Converse sneakers. (They haunt me to this day.)

I am just shocked that none of my trendy NYC friends have enlightened me on these fabulous kid shoes. Hmmm...maybe they are keeping them a secret so their kids are the best dressed... Either way, next time I visit, my little B will be sporting a pair. (Ugh, mommy needs a paying job.)

If you haven't seen them yet - check them out!!! www.vincentshoestore.us

I am in love with the 'Betty's'.

The Drive By Pick-Up

While driving home this afternoon from a day at the pool, I notice a car riding in unison with me. I look to my right, and it is this old, gap toothed, poorly groomed God forsaken man. He is smiling and mouthing something at me. I quickly refocus on the road. I begin thinking to myself - being the mommy that I am, "What if little B's door isn't closed all the way? Or what if I left omething on top of the roof?" Despite my better judgement, I once again look to my right. Mr. Desperately Pathetic is all smiles. I can see his tonsils through the missing teeth. I flick him the bird.

Not only was he God's gift to shows like 'The Swan', but he was in some beat up 1980's bucket of a car.

This only makes me wonder...do I look like his type?!!

My new favorite sound...

is that of little B's feet as they pitter patter around the house. Amazingly enough, I can decipher happy pitter patter, upset/hurt pitter patter, angry pitter patter... All of which I love.

'Bye Bye Baby...I'm gonna miss you so...'

I put away little B's high chair today. She now insists on sitting at the table in her booster seat. Of course she selected the chair that was her daddy's throne. However, he relinquished the rights to his precious little - food throwing - angel.


I have mixed feelings about stowing away this enormous non-space saving piece of furniture. It is an obvious sign that my baby is quickly growing out of her baby'ness. A stage that I thought was suppose to feel like an eternity.


But along with the sadness, I equally and excitedly embrace the idea that someday this chair will return to my kitchen. It is not a final farewell.


I just hope when I do bid adieu to all of the baby apparatus that currently clutters my home, it will be with sentiments of accomplishment, fondness, and love for times cherished.

Lord knows...I am not at that point yet.

Oh I am so Lost...

I am a Lost junky. I was/am in love with Jack. Hubby and I started watching when it first debuted. We were quickly hooked. After a year and a half of ritual Wednesday night viewings, we both started to lose interest. It just seemed to be draggggg-ing on-nnn. The night little B was born, I tried to watch an episode, but my epidural kicked in and I was too busy enjoying the high of a pain free birth. It was the beginning of what I thought was the end of the road for Jack and me. I had a new baby. I didnt need to worry about him and if he would ever return to the real world.



But, after tonight's episode, I am feeling all mushy inside for him again. The Jack drug is back. I am a relapsing addict.



I NEED A QUICK FIX! Waiting till next season is going to suck.

Proud Mama

I have been working with my little B on putting two words together. While outside playing this evening, she pointed to the swing and said 'Swing.' I obliged enthusiastically until I noticed the ungodly amount of bird shiat on it. She anxiously awaited an answer as to why we were not swinging. I simply told her 'Too much bird poop.' For the rest of the night, my profound child put two words together.

Bird Poop - Bird Poop - Bird Poop - Bird Poop - Bird Poop

To the floor you go.

Where and how did my child learn that when she is through with something she should just throw it on the floor? Done with the sippy cup - throw it on the floor. Snack bowl empty - throw it on the floor. Empty box of raisins - throw it on the floor. Finished brushing teeth - attempt to throw it on the floor. It is not a careless toss either, it is a very deliberate abandonment. I can not even begin to count the number of times a day I repeatedly say "Put it on the table."


Is this a predisposition we have as humans ? Some primitive instinct?


Unless, when mommy is away and daddy is in charge, a secret retaliatory throwing party takes place. Hmm...that might explain hubby's socks in random places.

My Tag Turn...

First, the rules: each player starts with seven random facts about themselves. People who are tagged need to write on their own blog the rules and answers. Then you choose seven people and make sure to leave a comment on their blog.

1. I stuck a small eraser shaped like a telephone in my nose when I was in the second grade. It never came out. A doctor told me (when I finally confessed this at the age of 16), that the snot would have dissolved it by then. I swear this is why I can not breath through my nose still.

2. I have to tee-tee 2 times before I go to bed EVERY night. Once just before lying down, then again before falling asleep. I think I am a little OCD . Either way, no camping in the woods for me.

3. I am a picker. I pick scabs, I pick zits, I pick peeling skin after a sunburn, I pick. Yes, even my nose but with a tissue. I have clean nostrils before leaving the house everyday.

4. I like older men. I find them extremely sexy. I have had many crushes on older men. My first crush I was 4 years old and in love with my older half brother. He is 13 years my senior.

5. My favorite room in a house is the bathroom. I can spend hours in it. In elementary school, I would study sitting on the toilet. The mirror is my friend and enemy. It helps me find things to pick.

6. I love toilet paper. I can clog a toilet I love it so much. My Aunt Rose use to warn me about my usage any time I was at her house.

7. I am terrified of cats. I had a kitten once for a total of 2 days. It slept on my chest, and I lay paralyzed all night. It pooped under my bed. It hissed at me. My friend had to come and get it. I was too scared to even pick her (it) up. I was 29 years old.

The Book Club Whore

Somewhere between my bottled water and a brownie, I admitted to premarital sex and having slept with my 'work husband'. Why I admitted these things, I have no idea. Maybe I have sex on the brain, although I am not really in the mood today. I am still in the single digits...so whore is not a title I would even consider for myself.

Note to self, tell less personal information at the next BOOK club.

What's up doc?

My little B had her picture taken with the Easter Bunny. You would have thought she was sitting on God's lap with the smiles adorning her face. She LOVED this freaky costumed rabbit. After all was said and done, the moms were gathering to chat. What does B want to do? Yup - go back to the freaky rabbit. After several failed attempts at keeping her from him, I started to get the whine. I hate the whine. It gets on my nerves - literally. Despite my desire to stay, we bid adieu. Of course, once B realized we had left, the tears flowed and loud screams followed. (She also turned a pretty shade of purple which is new.) She cried for her friend "E" and pointed back towards the elevator. It broke my heart to leave at that point, but I didn't want to risk returning to the same whiny behavior. We drove to daddy's office and life was wonderful again. Typical.

I do think my poor pumpkin is burnt out tho. We have been on the go everyday for almost 2 weeks now. As soon as we got home today, she played all by herself for what seemed like hours. That is always the first sign my baby misses her house.

Me on the other hand, I am sick to my stomach. I have eaten more junk food in the past 2 weeks then I have since tailgating season. Today alone I had my leftover Dairy Queen and chocolate chip cookies. ack